Is This Really Happening?


As Christmas rapidly approaches I cannot help but to feel overwhelmed and stressed. It's not just caused by the holidays, life has taken a sharp turn just before the New Year, leaving my anxiety through the roof. In fact, this might be the most stressed I have been in the last ten years or so. Life couldn't happen at a worse time--I'm laughing at myself right now. I am not ready to get into the details of what exactly is happening, but I will tell you more as time progresses. I think the hardest part about the next few weeks is going to be the fact that I will have no time to process what's going on in my life, there's no time for emotions, I have to just pick up the reigns and go. I am hoping that this change will be for the better. In the long run I know everything will be okay, but holy shit, am I freaking out right now. 

On another note, I can't help but to feel guilty for uprooting Lyla over and over again. Being that her father is in the military, stability has been something that our lives has lacked for the last five years. I am just ready to be somewhere I can envision staying for a long time, find a school I want Lyla to attend, build my career, and buy a home. In order for all of that to happen I need to get through this. I know I'm making it sound like this is something bad, it's not, it's a great opportunity and if there is one thing I've learned from mistakes in the past, it's to grab an opportunity when it presents itself. If it's something you want, go for it. Take the necessary risks. Life is what you make it after all

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