Time For Change, See Ya 2016!

Hit the road Jack and don't cha come back no more... Can we all just agree that 2016 was a huge let down for practically everyone? I mean, seriously. What the hell happened? I don't even want to do a recap of the year, it was that horrible. So I won't, I'll skip the recap completely and instead sarcastically thank 2016 for leaving everyone's panties in a bunch. 2016 will forever be known as the year that pushed limits, tested morals, and forced emotional growth down our throats. 

It's ironic how humans are one of the most adaptive (if not the most) adaptive of species, but when it comes to change, we will fight tooth and nail. There's currently a lot changing in my personal life and it has left me feeling like I am backed into a corner with only two options. One being, I can fight this change and make it really hard and exhausting for myself. The second being, I can accept that I have little control over timing and just do what needs to be done and push through this transition phase with a smile on my face. I feel like we can treat 2016 with that same mentality. It's time to look at the bigger picture.

Goodbye 2016, you ruthless mother-effer. 

Is This Really Happening?

As Christmas rapidly approaches I cannot help but to feel overwhelmed and stressed. It's not just caused by the holidays, life has taken a sharp turn just before the New Year, leaving my anxiety through the roof. In fact, this might be the most stressed I have been in the last ten years or so. Life couldn't happen at a worse time--I'm laughing at myself right now. I am not ready to get into the details of what exactly is happening, but I will tell you more as time progresses. I think the hardest part about the next few weeks is going to be the fact that I will have no time to process what's going on in my life, there's no time for emotions, I have to just pick up the reigns and go. I am hoping that this change will be for the better. In the long run I know everything will be okay, but holy shit, am I freaking out right now. 

On another note, I can't help but to feel guilty for uprooting Lyla over and over again. Being that her father is in the military, stability has been something that our lives has lacked for the last five years. I am just ready to be somewhere I can envision staying for a long time, find a school I want Lyla to attend, build my career, and buy a home. In order for all of that to happen I need to get through this. I know I'm making it sound like this is something bad, it's not, it's a great opportunity and if there is one thing I've learned from mistakes in the past, it's to grab an opportunity when it presents itself. If it's something you want, go for it. Take the necessary risks. Life is what you make it after all

BLOGMAS DAY 15: A Letter To My Sister On Her 32nd Birthday

Happy Birthday Joss, 
Today you would've turned thirty-two. I sit here day dreaming of what life would be like if you were still here, how would we have celebrated your special day? Would we be out at a bar with Dill sipping on some fruity cocktails (because those were your favorite) or would we be inside somewhere surrounded by family, would you have children?  --I like to think you would have. 

This morning Dad sent me a picture of an unusually bright pink sunrise, and here in San Diego it started to rain just as "I'll be missing you" played in my car. Coincidence? Maybe, but I couldn't help but to feel you were near today. I fucking miss you Joscelyn, not just on birthdays or anniversaries but every day of my life. Every year I try to come up with a way to celebrate you (I say that lightly).  To state the obvious, celebrating your birthday isn't what it used to be--it's painful. 

Thank you for all those years you let me open your birthday presents and all those birthday candles you let me lick the frosting off of...and stick back in the cake. My only hope is at the moment you left this world, you knew how much you were loved. I think the greatest present of all is to love and be loved. You loved harder than anyone, you are the foundation of how I perceive love and I'll love you forever. 

Happy Birthday Jossy. 

Love always and forever after,

 Your little sister

BLOGMAS DAYS 5-7 : Pictures Of Recently Enjoyed Things

 There is not a place more cozy than my Nonna's home--especially during Christmas time.

I had a sudden urge to go on a walk in 35 degree weather at 6:30a.m and I was accompanied by these cute pups. 

 The fog was just thickening. 

I was happy being the passenger for the first time in a long time and took time to find beauty where it's usually hard to find--on the 215 South. 

Happy Hump Day everyone! So....yea, I missed a few days of Blogmas (as I predicted), but it was for a good reason, I was out of town celebrating my dad's 59th birthday. It's been over five years since we were all together to celebrate my dad's birthday, so as you can imagine the quality time was much needed. My Dad had no idea that we were all coming, which I think was the best part. We spent a lot of time outdoors (my dad's favorite) and then when it got dark, we gathered in the living room and watched movies. For his actual birthday we went out to sushi then headed back to my Nonna's home for cake (pumpkin cake) and lastly back to our family home for presents and a movie--simple yet fulfilling. I hope you all had a wonderful last couple of days, look forward to seeing much more on my blog, as I will return to my humble home in a few hours.

BLOGMAS DAY 4: Hot Chocolate

Christmas mugs are adorable. And yes, clearly I enjoy marshmallows as a topping. 

I love cold weather, but I'm going to be honest, my body hasn't quite adjusted back to the frigid mountain weather here in the Sierra Nevadas --after all, I have lived in Florida for four years and now San Diego. One thing I look forward to about cold weather is hot chocolate. Every Christmas morning my mother would make us a hot cup.  I've been fond of the drink ever since I was a sprout, so tonight I thought I'd share a few recipes I found on Pinterest, that I haven't exactly tried yet, but that I'd like to get around to trying this month.  Hope you enjoy! 

 It's safe to say that I've grown out of microwave hot chocolate. My new favorite quick fix is Nestle's Abuelita Hot Chocolate. Depending on how many people want hot chocolate, I'll cut it in half, otherwise it gets too rich and frothy for my liking. 

Currently In the Mountains

It is day three of Blogmas, and I have found myself in the mountains once again. I'm currently sitting by a wood burning stove, flames flickering, surrounded by close family watching a movie-- I feel cozy. This year we will be celebrating Christmas at my parent's new home. At first I wasn't sure how it would feel celebrating in this new home, but surprisingly I am excited. In fact, I just finished talking with my dad about decorating for Christmas --he thinks I am a little too excited. It is exciting though,  right? I love putting things together and making things extra special. I can't wait until it's my turn to entertain holidays in my home (whenever, that happens).

I know the last few posts seem a little "last minute", and they are, but I promise I have so much planned for the next few weeks--bare with me. However, the next couple of days I will be spending with my family doing whatever it is we will do, you can expect; check-ins, photos, and adventures. Last night was a hot mess and today we drove for almost five hours, to say the least, I am exhausted. With that being said, I think I am going to rest my sleepy head.

Goodnight Loves!


Blogmas Day 2

This picture is from last Christmas, the last Christmas I would ever have in my childhood home. 

Happy Friday everyone! I Hope you all had a lovely one. I just came home from Christmas dress shopping and surprisingly I didn't come home empty-handed. I usually am the most indecisive person on the planet when it comes to choosing something, anything for myself, but this time it only took four stores and two different malls. I forgot what it feels like to go out shopping, childless. Yes, this evening I, Lauren, went to the mall without having to push a stroller, or stop toddler hands from touching items I cannot afford and it was amazing. And get this, I actually talked with an adult today, about adult things--marvelous. It was like for a brief moment in time, I felt relaxed. The most relaxed I've felt in a really long time--does that sound bad? I love my little girl more than I love anything/one in this entire world, but sometimes Mommy needs a little break and by little I mean three hours. That's all, three hours and I am good to go. 

Prior to Christmas dress shopping, Lyla and I tackled some actual Christmas shopping--after the gym of course. Now, here I am at almost midnight hoping to publish this post before day three of Blogmas. I planned on having a lot more time to write and post some cute pictures, but now all I can think about is sleep and the fact that I have to wakeup, pack for a trip, and drive to my destination in the morning. It's going to be a late night, seeing as I still need to do laundry. *Sigh. Today just slipped away. 

Sweet dreams to all. 



Day 1

Happy December lovelies.  The time we've all (well, most) have been waiting for is here,  Blogmas! I want to promise you all that I will post every single day, but past history will show that it's easier said than done--and I know I am not the only one. There are a lot of mixed emotions about Blogmas, some people absolutely love it and others loathe the idea of other people enjoying it so much " Christmas is one day not twenty-five..." we've all heard it.  Personally I love being festive, it's fun and I refuse to become someone who sucks the fun out of things. At the same time, I understand a lot of people's frustration about Blogmas and the pressure it puts on one's creativity, but at the same time I like to look at it as a challenge, it's meant to frustrate our creative brains in order for us to grow as writers/creators. I feel like a lot of bloggers (including myself) get frustrated when they meet that creative hump and a lot of the times just give up. For me it's always hardest to get back into something after I didn't meet my goals--I think this is like my third year attempting Blogmas, but I am not someone who gives up. My goal for this year is obviously to post everyday for the next twenty-five days, but being practical, I'll probably miss a few or a lot, depending. As long as I output more posts than I have in the previous years, I will be content--I want to participate, but I am not exactly looking for a gold medal. With that being said, let's remove our Scrooge goggles and support everyone whether they choose to partake in the festivities or not. 

What You Can Expect:

- Christmas Flashbacks, Gift Guides, Lifestyle, DIYs, Food, and more. 

I hope everyone has a lovely December, cheers!


P.S. If you are participating, leave your links in the comment section below so I can check out your take on Blogmas.